My Mental Health Story Part 5 - Lets Sidetrack To Football

Written By David Jappy

My original part 5 was going to be about the course I went on to help with my condition; however, after listening to Sky Sports News, and particularly Tim Sherwood on Monday morning (13th April,) I have decided to sidetrack and write about something I feel very, very strongly about!

And this is about the sports commentators, co-commentators, pundits, presenters, and studio guests who insist on using the words ‘anxiety’ and ‘anxious’ when talking about sports, predominantly football. Those are people playing games and also fans watching, and please bear with me while I explain.

If you have read some of my stories, you will know I have previously been diagnosed with anxiety. A horrible condition, and if you continue to read my stories, you will find it can also be a debilitating one; it has brought me to my knees, it has made me cry, and it has stopped me from living a normal life. That is how bad anxiety can affect you.

So it is at this point I need to ask all these sports people, including Tim Sherwood, how players and fans can have this issue and horrible condition and continue on as normal, because trust me, at times I wish I could have done just that, continue on as normal – and let me explain.

Imagine having any medical condition that changed your life or played a serious part of your life, and you sit down to watch one of your favourite TV programmes, and that condition gets mentioned every couple of minutes as Tim did on Monday while discussing Arsenal’s present footballing situation? Well, that’s what I was listening to, and this is probably, maybe definitely, is something that affects people more who have suffered with mental health issues.

The figures for people in the UK suffering with anxiety differ drastically. I have found 6% of the population, up to 30% plus, can be affected by this condition at any time, but the lower figure of 6% is over 4 million people. How many of them will be playing premiership football each weekend? My personal guess is – none!

Now it’s not necessarily the fault of these people, because let’s look at 'synonyms.' Put the word ‘anxious’ into a synonym search and you will get – ‘nervous.’ When you put ‘anxiety’ in, you will, well, you will sometimes get nerves!

I have mentioned distractions when dealing with anxiety; keep the mind occupied, and it is quite normal that you won’t feel your anxiety, and this is something I will go into with my own issues later. I have also mentioned physical exercise, and that too is a massive distraction.

But normally, this is how things work, so if, say, Manchester City are 1-0 down at Anfield and need a draw or a win to hypothetically win the league, or even just the game, are their players really going to feel anxious? Of course not; they are going to be concentrating on the game so much, anxiety will probably be the furthest thing from their minds. Could they feel nervous? Of course they could, but again, even that is unlikely, as they will be totally focused on the game; their minds are very unlikely to wander into any other condition, and the biggest difference is that when the final whistle goes, whatever feelings they had will have gone. Maybe replaced by disappointment or jubilation, depending on the result!

So please don’t tell me players are anxious, looking anxious (I’ve already questioned how you ‘see’ anxiety,) or how they are playing with anxiety, or any other explanation that involves playing football and using ‘anxiety' or 'anxious' as a verb to help explain football players, how they are playing, or worse, fans!

But as a sufferer I certainly don’t want to hear it mentioned every minute by Tim in his analysis or his colleagues while commentating or co-commentating. I always feel Gary Neville uses these descriptions too often as well. But then, once during a match is too often!

Let’s turn to the fans; the crowd ‘looks’ anxious, and I think I’ve covered that one. The crowd 'feels' anxious; other than my own diagnosis, I don’t know how you ‘feel’ anxiety in a crowd, or when you are so focussed on a game. Have you ever walked into a high-level work-related meeting where tensions are running high? I have, and I can honestly say I never felt the anxiety, nerves, and tension - yes - but anxiety no. And I know the difference, trust me on this one. I wouldn’t wish anxiety on my worst enemy. But how I wish I could feel nervous running out to 80,000 fans at Old Trafford every other week!

As a United fan, in 1999, when United were playing Spurs, and were going for the infamous treble, I was standing behind the goal on the 16th of May at Old Trafford, a game United had to win to keep up the hopes of winning those three trophies. Had United drawn or lost, the title would have gone to Arsenal, and the treble would never have happened.

At 0-1 to Spurs, tension and nerves were high in the stadium, as this wasn’t in the script. Just before halftime Beckham worked his magic, and during the break spirits lifted. Two minutes after half time, and attacking the goal I was standing behind, a long ball found its way to Andy Cole. A sublime touch and a lob over Ian Walker, the Spurs keeper, and United were on their way to part one of that treble.

I was in there somewhere

"Old Trafford (interior), Manchester United" by stacey.cavanagh is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

You don’t get much more of a high-stakes game than that, winning a league title, part one of a treble no team had ever won, and only one has done since, and yes, the other side of Manchester; and a piece of history in English football. But Tim, the thing is I never felt anxious, something I have a lot of experience in, and I couldn’t feel the anxiety in the stadium either! However the fans are feeling during a game, as soon as that final whistle goes, those feelings go too, and as previously mentioned, jubilation or disappointment takes over. No-one could ever blow a final whistle on my anxiety; that I promise you

It’s all nerves, trust me, as I know. I have had anxiety, and I have played in finals at my level of sport. It doesn’t matter if you are Roy Keane or Andy Cole trying to win the Premier League or if you are unfit old me trying to win League One in the Telford Pub Sunday League, the feelings and nerves are the same, as we are all the same when it comes to sports; we are just playing at different levels.

What we do have in common is that Me, Roy, and Andy will all be nervous before a game; we will not be anxious, trust me, because of two things. I have been diagnosed with anxiety, and it is nowhere near the same as nerves, but also when that whistle goes to start a game that I have played, you are concentrating so much on the game you don’t have time to feel nervous, let alone anxious.

I will often say, ‘I have been diagnosed with anxiety,’ because I believe it is a word that is used too freely by people who feel a bit uneasy. I often hear people saying, ‘I feel anxious.' But these people have no experience of discussing anxiety with professionals or medical staff, so how do they know? And it is used too freely by sports media to describe footballing situations when they too have no experience of the condition.

So please, please stop using those two words to describe players and fans when they are not there! As mentioned, it is not really your fault because of those synonyms, but for people like me, I do not want to hear this over and over again when it simply does not apply.

I think one of the strangest things is that a few years ago, in collaboration with His Highness Prince William, Sky Sports highlighted mental health topics in sport, and many people in sports highlighted their own issues. But where do we stand when we have been diagnosed with a specific mental health problem, and it means we have to listen to it every week when hearing descriptions of footballing situations when it isn’t there? Sky Sports, while highlighting the situation, contributes to not helping people with mental health problems with their own people and choice of words!

If Tim Sherwood mentioned ‘anxiety’ or ‘anxious’ once that morning, he mentioned it ten times in the few minutes I could put up with it; that is how it affects me, and I can only assume it affects others in a similar situation. I just had to switch off!

So please, all you sports people out there. I am sure you have a list of words that you are not allowed to use when commentating, so please add these two words to that list. I do not want to hear them when they are totally irrelevant to the situation. We can’t even describe boxers in a ring using their heritage, regardless of how different the two may be. We have to use the colour of their shorts; even if their shorts are the same colour, we then have to use the colour of their trim or their gloves. Can you see where I am coming from? We frown upon using heritage to describe an individual, but it’s okay to use a diagnosed mental health condition to describe something that isn’t even there!

So I think my rant is about over, I hope you can understand how I feel about this. But please try to understand this from someone who has been diagnosed with anxiety and who knows the difference, as he has also played sports and has attended the highest levels of competitive sports!

I can say the same for the use of the word ‘bravery.’ How many stories do we hear of brave service people, my own family included, who put their lives on the line or suffered terrible physical injuries to give us freedom? Who threw themselves on an IED or in front of enemy fire to save comrades or civilians, and who sit watching football to hear that Van Dijk was ‘brave’ because he headed a ball playing football – really. Well, not really brave, is it? He’s playing football.

My granddad, during WW1, of all the regiments, he was in the Royal Medical Corps. Imagine the sights he saw? A remembrance to all those heroic servicemen who faced the horrors of the D-Day landings. They went to the beaches without question so we could do the same with our freedom. My great uncle’s war grave at Boulogne-sur-Mer. The war wasn’t even a year old; he sailed over 2,500 miles and died helping us. They all epitomise bravery. Then there is Van Dijk heading a football. According to commentators and sports pundits, it’s the same thing!

I know it must be difficult being a commentator at times and only having a few seconds to make something sound good. But as mentioned, there are words that cannot be used, so please consider adding ‘anxious’ and ‘anxiety’ to those already banned.

Thanks for reading

DJ

David Jappy

An ordinary bloke who likes to write, take photos, cycle, and have a laugh and a beer with friends.

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My Mental Health Story Part 6 - Lets Talk Exercise
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My Mental Health Story Part 4 - The Downhill Slide Begins